TO BE OR NOT TO BE (A NICE GUY)

"Nice guys finish last," the old saying goes. Is it true? Well, it certainly has its pros and cons. Let's start with the pros:

You're likable and are generally well-liked. People can't help but to like you.

You're kind to and considerate of others. You're the one others can count on.

You have good karma. The universe cannot be fooled. No good action goes unrewarded. No malicious action goes unpunished.

You're a woman's guy friend.
You're a comforting presence, especially for women.

You have a drama-less life or at least one with less drama. Domestic violence, public and private shouting matches and jail time are not for you.

Now, we have the cons:

You're so eager to please and be liked, often to your detriment. So, you're subservient toward others, allow disrespect and martyr yourself. You keep taking crap. So, others keep it coming.

You receive and tolerate more disrespect than the edgier guys. Maybe you don't command respect, but you don't demand it either.

You tolerate and excuse that disrespect, often even blaming yourself for it. You were respectful and in turn were disrespected, but somehow it's your fault. You think it's always your fault because you undervalue yourself.

You're a woman's guy friend, but nothing more.

You're comforting but not sexy.

You may often be left on the sidelines watching the fun.That includes seeing the edgier guys with hot (and horny) women. Your life may not be a slow-motion train wreck, but it might not be much fun either. Such is the life of many a too-nice guy.


You may have less sexual encounters. Let's face it. A Simon Cowell would get laid sooner than a Mister Rogers (pictured above).


More interesting points about nice guys can be found here: http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/niceguys.shtml

Nothing's wrong with being a "nice guy." The problem is repeatedly reminding yourself you're one. This encourages victim thinking when you are mistreated, asking "Why?" and forgetting that some people are just mean. So, maybe firming up and holding your ground against such people means at least occasionally forgetting that you're a nice guy.